Thursday, 22 May 2008

Pissed again

I have been drinking too much, maybe I am developing a problem.I have 1 glass of wine and I don't want to stop, I start enjoying myself and I want to keep going. I drink with people, I drink alone. Sometimes I blame Jack. He drank every day, I drank whenever I saw him more or less. He said he was going to stop drinking once, I think he managed 2 or 3 days.

I used to go a fortnight without drinking but now I find it hard to do 4 days. I wasn't enjoying drinking last year so it was easy not to, but since I went on the pills I have been loving it. The info that comes with the pills says you're not meant to drink with them but I have paid no attention.

Sol thinks the reason I get in such a state when I drink these days is because I shouldn't be mixing it with the pills.

On Friday I went out for Jill Ds Birthday, I hadn't been out drinking with her before. Other girls were out too and it was a laugh. Jill D had had 3 double whiskeys before even leaving the house. She doesn't get much practice at drinking and she fell over twice (that might have been because she was wearing spiky, black, sparkly stiletto sling-backs rather than her usual walking shoes.

I tried to persuade her to come into town with me to some late opening bars but she decided against it. Just as well because I was of my face and she'd have ended up in town with a useless piss-head and would have probably had to get me in a taxi home straightaway. I ended up borrowing a bike from Shara to get home. I'm lucky that I didn't crack my head open because I was swerving all over the pavement, I could not control the bike at all. I woke up on my sofa at 6am with my coat and shoes still on. I think I might have drunk and tried to dial Jack, idiotic I know, at least I didn't manage. What a state.

I'm a bit pissed now, actually. I'm currently drinking limoncello & orange juice. It isn't nice, it's just alcoholic. I should have been doing housework but now that I'm tipsy I don't care enough.

I have to watch the drinking, though, because I'm from a family with a history of addiction.

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